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The Pick-up Lab: 50 Scientifically Proven Tips to Attract Female Interest

Do you want a life partner, a sexual partner, a female friend or a one-night stand? No matter your goal, you need to attract a woman first. While some attributes such as good looks and fresh breath might seem logical in the search for female companionship, other attributes such as smell and facial symmetry seem much more nebulous. But, when a 2005 survey of more than 900 people who had been using online dating services revealed that three-quarters had not found what they were seeking, then it seems physical attraction has much to do with being physically present and accounted for.

Hence the following tips on how to attract a female in person. The tips have been categorized and are in no particular order. Therefore, one tip is no more or less important than another. However, they all are based upon scientific studies and marketing reports and surveys, so you might find a few ideas here that will help you on your quest.


We included pheromones, since the concept of a human pheromone, or sexual scent of attraction, has been debated and researched for years. But, pheromones, like other scents, hitch a ride through the air on other particles such as water droplets and generally hover just 10 inches off the ground. So chances that pheromones will add bonus points to your delivery are slim to none. However, the following tidbits might help a bit in your quest for attraction:

  1. Underarm attraction: Dr. Winifred Cutler, a biologist and behavioral endocrinologist, discovered that once any overbearing underarm sweat was removed, what remained were the odorless materials containing pheromones.
  2. Chemical communicate: On one side of the debate are the pheromone boosters, some of whom have founded companies that sell pheromone-based perfumes and pharmaceuticals. On the other side are skeptics who argue that the phrase “human pheromone” is a contradiction in terms. Between the two extremes lies a middle ground of researchers who are doubtful of the strongest claims but unwilling to ignore the possibility that humans, like many other animals, use chemicals to communicate.
  3. Humans are difficult: Humans are “the hardest of all” mammals to work with, yet some studies suggest that humans may also respond to some chemical signals from other people.
  4. Male pheromones help women: Use this line to get a date: According to the Athena Institute, male scents play a role in maintaining the health of women, particularly the health of the female reproductive system.
  5. Try not to smell like a brother or father: Women preferred the scent of men whose immune systems were unlike their own. If a man’s immune system was similar, a woman tended to describe his T-shirt as smelling like her father or brother in a t-shirt smelling test. If a woman says you smell like her brother or father, your luck may have gone down the drain.

Physical Attributes

In the first study linked in this list, researchers discovered that good looks comprise just one point in a three-point woman-magnet triangle. The other two characteristics include warmth and competence. With that said, some men can’t develop warmth and competence without feeling good about their looks. The following tips may help in that regard:

  1. First impressions are important: The stereotype that a person who is physically attractive has other positive qualities as well has been noted in many studies. Jackson, Hunter and Hodge (1995; as cited by Taylor, et. al) state that attractive people also are believed to possess qualities that seem irrelevant to physical beauty, such as mental health, dominance, and intelligence.
  2. Great teeth: You might think muscles are the key to attracting a woman, but 99.7% of Americans believe a smile is an important social asset. If you have bad teeth (and bad breath), fix the issue if you want to attract women.
  3. Attractiveness counts: Shelly Chaiken, a professor of psychology at New York University, proved through one study that physical attractiveness was key to success. While you may not be a “10,” you can spruce up your appearance to be the best – and, therefore – the most successful person possible. This counts in the dating arena.
  4. Sport your colors: Blue, universally, is the color of business and of peace. Blue also suggests loyalty, an attribute that appeals to a person who seeks long-term relationships. But, if blue isn’t your color, you can learn more about which color to choose to increase your odds of being noticed.
  5. Red is good, too: While women who wear red can guarantee a date, men who wear red also score high. According to Andrew Elliott, a professor of psychology at the University of Rochester, “Red is a dominant cue in the wild when it’s shown on a male. So human females who see red on a male will view him as more dominant, and that will lead her to be more attracted to him.”
  6. Cleanliness is a universal attribute: “Good complexion, clear eyes, good teeth and hair, firm muscle tone, and a steady gait are found to be universally appealing to both genders.” (Nevid and Rathus, 369-70). These traits lead to perceptions of poise, sociability, popularity, and persuasiveness.
  7. Consider plastic surgery: If you’re not a “10″ or even a “5,” you might consider plastic surgery. Kurtzberg (1968) conducted a study where he had plastic surgery performed on inmates and found that once released, they were less likely to return to jail than those without the surgery. This study might convince you to look less like a convict and more like dating material.
  8. No scars: Even though women find men with scars attractive, they would not have a permanent relationship with them. However, if you’re after one-night stands, then forget the plastic surgery.
  9. Be fit: David Frederick of UCLA found that women were more physically attracted to brawny men, especially for a fling. But when it comes to finding a long-term partner, they tend to pick a regular man over a mate with huge biceps.
  10. Be genetically different: There’s not much you can do to change your genes, but if you stray into different cultures, you might have a better chance of finding a woman. This study shows that women are attracted to men from different gene pools.
  11. Build a symmetrical face: Experiments have found that women are more attracted to men who have features that are symmetrical. So, if your face is lop-sided, consider some surgery.
  12. Deepen that voice: Anthropologist Coren Apicella discovered that Hazda women preferred deeper voices in their men. Deep voices, she claims, signal some biologically relevant information to potential mates such as fertility or the ability to put food on the table. From this information, you might develop a deeper tone or become a Hazda.

Body Language

It has been proven that body language can reveal how you feel about a person. The more you know about how to hold your body, the more you can persuade a member of the opposite sex to join you. And, you can learn much about whether a woman is attracted to you or not by her actions as well.

  1. Trust body language: First, you need to trust body language, or kinesics. Albert Mehrabian, who pioneered the understanding of communication in the 1960s, substantiated that only 7% of a message is verbally communicated, while 93% is transmitted nonverbally.
  2. Add a swagger: But, only to the shoulders for men. In a study that involved 700 individuals who participated in a series of five studies, Texas A&M University professor Louis G. Tassinary and co-author Kerri Johnson of New York University discovered that men who walked with a swagger in their shoulders were accepted as more attractive by women.
  3. Learn how to dance: A study from Rutgers University and the University of Washington shows that a man’s dips, spins, twirls and glides may be telegraphing to women their genetic superiority. One problem: the study used 183 Jamaican teenagers ages 14 to 19 as they danced to a popular reggae song.
  4. Symmetry counts: Symmetry comes into play while dancing. If your body is off-balance, you won’t be a good dancer. And, according to this science article, women seem to think good dancers make good lovers.
  5. The woman signals…: David Givens again brings some points forward, this time on how to send and read body language for the bedroom. These four particular “submissive displays” are what you might want to see from a woman: lifted shoulders, pigeon-toed stance, a look up from under the eyebrows and upward-facing palms. If you see one or more of these signs, grab her upturned hand and leave together!
  6. Don’t mimic women: What works for women usually backfires for men. So, don’t dance too close, stare into a woman’s eyes (although direct eye contact is great) or dress seductively. Those clues should tell you that a woman wants you, so take note!
  7. More signals to watch for: “Flirting expert” Dr. Monica Moore of Webster University provides more clues about when a woman is interested in you. They include the darting glance, short and sustained gazing, primping and preening, smiling, lip licking, pouting, giggling, laughing, and nodding.
  8. Take a tip from bowerbirds: Gail Patricelli of the University of Maryland in College Park studied bowerbird mating behaviors in the Australian outback. She learned that when males conform to female behaviors, they become more successful breeders. “Natural selection favors males that are responsive to females and know how to communicate well,” said Patricelli. Males that are sensitive to females’ signals are more likely to mate with several females.
  9. Learn what women look for: Studies by York psychologist Dr Arthur Arun found that it takes individuals between one and four minutes to decide whether or not they could fall in love with someone. And as witty as your one-liner was, 55 percent of that impression is not made by what we say, but by our body language. This layout, provided by Cosmopolitan and based on several different studies, is designed for women – but you can learn much about what women look for in a man’s body language through their slide show.
  10. Learn the twelve steps to seduction: R.L. Birdwhistle, in his studies on human body language, suggested 24 steps from initial male/female contact to a fully intimate, sexual relationship and a sequence to those steps. Interestingly, it appeared to him that it was most often the girl who was responsible for the first move, just as Dr. Monica Moore discovered. A Dr. Morris reduced those 24 steps to twelve, and they are listed in this article.

Psychology & Behavior

The psychology of approaching and attracting women is nebulous. Who knows why and how some people are attracted to each other? But, some of the studies below, based upon psychological and behavioral research, might help you lower the odds against meeting and dating a fantastic woman.

  1. Be creative: Professional artists and poets hook up with two or three times as many sex partners as other people, new research indicates. The more creative the study participants, the more partners they’d had. Grab a paint brush, now!
  2. Develop an opening line: A UK study showed that many women made decisions about prospective partners after just 30 seconds. Although looks came into play, the opening line was what counted. Favorite opener? “What’s your favorite pizza topping?”
  3. Take your time – or not: This tip depends upon what you want from the woman who may enter your life. If you want a short-term relationship, you can forget that list you made for the perfect partner – for men, all women look good when in a hurry to make a choice according to this study. But, if you want to follow that list for the perfect mate, then you need to take your time.
  4. Watch the female: David Givens, an anthropologist, states that women often give the first signals for flirting. Your job is to be aware and alert to these signals, which Givens freely provides in this article.
  5. You don’t need to bungee-jump: A new study found men are more likely to engage in risky behavior, like sky-diving or bungee jumping, when they’re sexually motivated. While some women enjoy watching this risk-taking behavior, there is no proof that they’re attracted to it. In fact, this type of risk-taking tends to turn women off when those women seek consistency and security.
  6. Some risk-taking can’t be avoided: While abnormal risk-taking might be avoided, studies have shown that men cannot avoid displaying risky behaviors when they want to attract women. Risk-taking can be a tool that men use to show potential mates that they have desirable qualities such as confidence or ambition.
  7. Make plenty of money: Daniel Kruger, an assistant research scientist in the School of Public Health, discovered that financial consumption was the only factor that predicted how many partners men wanted in the next five years, and also predicted the number of partners they had in the previous five years.
  8. Hang around with ordinary guys: A study showed that when ‘hot’ women were paired with ‘ordinary’ guys, men had more confidence about approaching the women. So, if you’re just starting to body-build, then don’t hang out with muscle men.
  9. Buy a Maserati: The roar of a luxury car engine actually does cause a primeval physiological response, according to one study. The roar of an Italian sports car aroused women much more than the quiet Volkswagen Polo. The car with the most response? The Maserati.
  10. Develop your “parental investment”: In one study, women, “who were generally much more discriminating than men,” chose men whose overall desirability as a mate matched the women’s self-perceived physical attractiveness. In other words, men who fit the woman’s perception of a full-time mate seemed more attractive than any other man.
  11. Look for similarities: A 2003 study, reported in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, showed that of 1,000 young New York volunteers, people’s stated preferences in a partner correlated with their opinion of themselves. Thus wealthy, educated, high-achieving people of both sexes wanted partners who were also rich and successful. The tall preferred the tall, the very short the short. People look for the safety of compatibility rather than the dangerous excitement of being at odds.
  12. Think love, not sex: Romance seems to steep in parts of the brain that are rich in dopamine, a chemical known to affect emotions in both men and women. These brain regions are also linked by other studies to the motivation for rewards. “Romantic love is one of the most powerful of all human experiences,” said study member Helen Fisher, an anthropologist at Rutgers University. “It is definitely more powerful than the sex drive.”
  13. Stress safety : Unless the woman sends outrageous signals to you, like licking whipped cream seductively from her ice cream sundae while staring you in the eye, then take the subtle route. Female animals, birds and humans all like to feel safe. So, take off that jacket, wrap it around her to protect her and tell her how committed you are to keeping her safe. While this has nothing to do with mating among fiddler crabs, it might have everything to do with your success.
  14. Raise your expectations: Although a woman likes to feel safe, she doesn’t like to be patronized. According to one survey of college women at Waseda University in Japan, about 60 percent of the female students surveyed want their potential spouses to have a higher income that their own salaries. Additionally, about half of those women want their future mates to have graduated from prestigious universities such as, at least, Waseda, Keio and Sophia.

Market Yourself

Many men have learned that women are far different from men and need to be approached differently. Fortunately for men today (men such as David Cameron, for example), many marketing firms focus on how to approach women. Why not use some of their techniques to build rapport with the opposite sex? Not surprisingly, many tips come from women. Here are a few examples:

  1. It’s all about control: Sure, it’s ok to connect with a woman. But, if you want her totally, then give her control. Once she has control of the situation, then allow her to connect on her own terms.
  2. Don’t stereotype: Overall, women are much better defined by their occupations, interests and identities than by gender. Avoid the “all women do this” syndrome and focus on that woman’s unique characteristics. Make sure you let her know that you’ve noticed them, too, especially if those characteristics turn you on.
  3. Be a good salesman: “Be a good listener and pour on the empathy,” is part of the advice offered to the Realtor who sells homes to single women. Another clue worth heeding is, “The key is listening, understanding and then influencing according to the interest of the individual.”
  4. Watch the details: Women, literally, see things differently than men. Women have more rods in their eyes than men, and rods are sensitive to light and detect small movements in the visual field. This means women generally have greater peripheral vision than men, or, in other words, women see more than men at one glance. This is one more reason why first impressions are important and why they happen for women so quickly.
  5. Find out what turns women off: While this list goes into detail about what sort of marketing turns women off, you can use this list to your advantage. One tip from this page: Keeping her waiting or otherwise wasting her precious time.
  6. Sell yourself: While this blog entry talks about selling technology to women, the same tips can be used to sell yourself to a woman: What can you do for her, tell stories (not lies!), and be authentic.
  7. Forget seduction: If you’ve come this far in the list, you know that sexy come-ons usually don’t work with most women. Instead, like some undergarment companies have learned, you might sell your benefits rather than your sexiness to her. Nothing is sexier to some women than the benefit of a house in the Hamptons, for instance.
  8. Learn how women think: Women tend to think in terms of a “web” of interrelated factors, as opposed to a man’s tendency to think in a linear fashion. If you were a car, for instance, car, a woman might think of what she needs you to do first, and then consider your make and model second. Function comes first (and not necessarily sexual) and then looks.
  9. Think “Interconnectivity”: Andrea Learned, a well-known and esteemed marketer, recently wrote that the average consumer is changing and that this new consumer will rise out of the ashes of recession. “This more interconnected, community-aware and balanced brain processing of decisions means that your consumer is thinking more ‘like a woman’ every day.” If you’re part of that new way of thinking and connecting, then you don’t need many more tips. Except, perhaps, to remember to keep your fly zipped in public.

What makes you attractive? Do you know whether it’s your looks, or is it how you manage to Feng Shui your apartment for ultimate peace and calm? The quizzes and tests listed below could help you to learn more about your attractiveness potential, no matter if it concerns your looks, your intelligence, your personality, your sex life and more.

The sites below are listed in alphabetical order under each category. Their standing in the list is not a comment on whether we value one site and its tests or quizzes over another site.

Your Looks

How you look is a trigger for many potential mates, and this includes how healthy you feel, how you dress, and whether you smell like cigarettes or perfume (or just natural!). The following tests look at beauty, both male and female, from many different angles:

  1. Astro-Beauty Quiz: According to the sponsor of this quiz, iVillage, your personal approach to beauty and style may be partially based on how the elements of fire, earth, air and water are configured in your birth chart. This is a fun quiz for any gender, any age.
  2. Beauty and Style Quizzes: Chatterbean currently offers four quizzes that are geared to men and women of any age. They focus on natural beauty, self-consciousness, the ‘hidden power’ of your wardrobe and one test to determine your “passion for fashion.”
  3. BellaOnline Quizzes: Although the tests are for using your brain, almost all of the tests currently listed have something to do with the body or with what you might know about current television shows. But, if you think you need to learn more about tattooing, Ugly Betty and the musical, Hairspray, then go for it!
  4. CosmoGirl: The front page of this online magazine contains updated quizzes that help teen girls cope with fashion, beauty and grooming.
  5. devine.ca: If you ever wondered which star matches your personal fashion style, or if you want to determine your skin type, then you’ll find these quizzes here and much more. The focus is mainly on fashion, but divine.ca also has other quizzes on sex and love, health and wellness and fitness and nutrition.
  6. Fashion & Beauty Tests & Quizzes: Take fashion quizzes and tests that help you to determine whether you look older than your age, your style quotient, and grooming – for young men and women.
  7. Fitness: This online magazine focuses on health as beauty, and quizzes focus on skin types, healthy hair and tests for scents, make-up and the ideal beauty regimen for “glowing skin, healthy hair, and a gorgeous look.”
  8. The Beauty Test: This test is geared toward younger women, but the questions and answers may take older women back to when you were SO uncomfortable with your body. If you’d prefer not to go there, we understand!
  9. the fitmap: This site adds new beauty quizzes every week to provide readers with a comprehensive and fun way to teach them about beauty and skincare. If these quizzes bor you, you can try their other quizzes on exercise, dieting, fitness, health, lifestyle and nutrition.
  10. Your Beauty-Wellness Test: This test is based upon principles of health and beauty in the Chinese tradition, as it helps individuals to learn whether they are primarily yin, yang, or a balanced yin/yang in nature.

Your Personality

You can be as beautiful as the original Adam or Eve, but if your personality is disordered, your love life may be unsettled as well. A personality disorder is a set of traits that combine to negatively affect your life (and, often, the lives of others). But, on the whole, most personality disorders can be treated, although some are easier to treat than others. If you believe you may be suffering from a personality disorder or any other disorder, you should ask your family doctor to recommend a therapist in your area to meet with. Otherwise, you can enjoy these tests and have some fun as well – many of these tests are far from serious!

  1. Brainfall: If you want to understand how cheap you are, what kind of date you are, or even which Lord of the Rings character you might be, then this site will entertain you to no end. You can stray into some other featured quizzes here as well, including tests for love and relationships, lifestyles and IQ.
  2. Jung Typology Test: This test is based on Carl Jung and Isabel Myers-Briggs typological approach to personality. When you answer all questions, the results will reveal the description of your personality type. You can also use the type formula and strength of the preferences to assess online compatibility with your mate in the Jung Marriage Test and Demo of the Marriage Test.
  3. Personality 100: This site contains every serious personality test you can dream up and more. Some familiar ones include the Enneagram, Jung, the facial personality test and the body type personality test. Others include the “famous leader” test and the cerebral personality test.
  4. Personality Disorder Test: This test, sponsored by 4degreez.com, is not meant to be used as a diagnostic tool, but as a tool to give you insight into a potential disorder that may be having a negative impact on your life.
  5. Personality Quiz: Where else would you take a personality quiz other than a site that does nothing but personality quizzes? Learn about your personality profile, your inner traits, your love potential and much, much more at this site.
  6. Personality Tests: Are you a good or bad person? A loser or a winner? Maybe you’d like to take a music personality or travel personality test. This site contains all these tests and more specifically targeted to men or women, health tests, relationship tests and quizzes that will give you something to do for hours.
  7. QuizRocket: Although this site seems designed for younger men and women, the quizzes are fun and even silly in some cases – a great way to get to know a person if you take the quizzes together. Test personalities, love, relationships and IQ.
  8. Serious Tests: While the title of this site is serious, you can take them with a grain of salt if you like. Some of these tests are popular, such as the Keirsey Termperament Sorter and a test that’s similar to Myers-Briggs. Other tests, including the IQ tests and the Workingstiff Stress-o-Meter, might be more fun.
  9. The Big Five Personality Test: This test measures what many psychologists consider to be the five fundamental dimensions of personality. As you are rating yourself, you are encouraged to rate another person, as this comparison will give you a more accurate assessment of your traits.
  10. Tickle: Unlike many serious quiz sites, Tickle’s focus is on your funnybone. Learn more about your right brain, left brain, how you handle money, whether you’re a villain or not, or a possible vice-presidential candidate. Whether you learn more about yourself or not is not important – a person without a sense of humor, after all, is hardly attractive!

Your Intelligence

Many couples can tell you that they were drawn together by physical attributes, only to find out later that they were incompatible because one partner was smarter than the other partner. While love can cure most ills, one partner may begin to feel inadequate and the other partner may get frustrated if intelligence levels are not on keel. Take some of the tests below to learn what you can about yourself (and, maybe about your partner as well):

  1. 7 Types of Intelligence: So, which one is yours? Take this test to find where you stand in the scheme of intelligent test-takers.
  2. IQ Test Labs: Try this free PhD-certified IQ test to find out how you rank. This test will determine your IQ by evaluating nine distinct intellectual and mental abilities.
  3. Intelligence Test: Sometimes life isn’t about intelligence – it’s about common sense. Test your wit and brains with this short quiz.
  4. International High IQ Society: The International High IQ Society takes what’s best about the golden age of the intellectual salons—tolerance, moral engagement, and faith in the free play of ideas—and applies them to a contemporary setting. Take one of their tests to see if this is your intellectual style.
  5. Mensa Workout: Do you think your intelligence is among the best of the best? Try this Mensa workout, then, to see if you’re correct. If so, maybe you can join Mensa, as the only qualification for membership is a high IQ. That means only two percent of the world’s population would be considered as members (or, 100,000 Mensans in 100 countries throughout the world).
  6. MSN Encarta Quizzes: If you want to focus on something outside yourself, this site provides numerous quizzes that will test your intelligence on nature, television, arts, geography and even food. This site will boost your intelligence so you can go back and score higher at some of the other test sites!
  7. Queendom: This is the ‘land of tests,’ and most of them concern your intelligence. Think emotional intelligence, a needs test, a classical IQ test and a work style assessment. Once you know how smart you are, you can move on to relationship, health, attitude and career tests. Have fun!
  8. What’s Your EQ?: About.com’s psychology section offers a serious quiz on the ability to perceive, control, and evaluate emotions. The final results may surprise you.
  9. YouThink: This entire site is about intelligence, emotional intelligence, artificial intelligence…you get the idea. Some of the tests are fun, some are serious. This is one of those sites that will eat up hours in your day if you’re not careful…
  10. Your IQ Test: Even OkCupid leans toward the thinking that a person’s attractiveness is more than skin deep. Take this IQ test to determine your best intelligence in one of four areas.

Your Love, Sex and Relationships

You may already know that you’re the best lover around, but does everyone else share your opinion? Find out about your love, sex and relationship potentials through the following tests and quizzes.

  1. AVERT’s HIV and AIDS Quizzes: No, this isn’t meant to be a downer – it’s just a series of quizzes to help you learn more about sex, pregnancy, HIV, AIDS and condoms.
  2. How Well Do You Know Your Partner?: The Gottman Institute, which applies leading-edge research on marriage in a practical, down-to-earth therapy and trains therapists committed to helping couples, offers this short quiz for individuals to help them learn more about their partners.
  3. Love Quiz: The Family Dynamics Institute, a nonprofit marriage and family ministry headquartered in Franklin, Tennessee, provides this short quiz for you to mentally insert the name of your spouse or significant other (if you are not yet married). The results are based upon a numerical value, and you see the results as soon as you’re immediately done with the test.
  4. Love Quiz and Test: You can find free fun tests and quizzes at this site for you and your partner to take. At the end of each test, they provide an image and HTML code for you to show the results on your Web site, blog, or on your MySpace page.
  5. Marriage Quizzes: Are you married or engaged? Are you thinking about marriage? Learn more about the marrige counseling strategies that experts use as you take the many quizzes listed here.
  6. Relationship Quiz: Five easy questions to help you learn whether or not you’ve found your soulmate.
  7. Relationship Quizzes and Tests: What type of ex are you? Who wears the pants in your relationship? Are you being manipulated by your partner? Find answers to these questions and more at the FunQuizCards quiz site.
  8. Sexual Health Quiz: Discovery’s health site offers a 10-question fun sex quiz so you can test yourself on sex and intimacy. You might be surprised by what you know (or don’t know).
  9. The Original Internet Love Test: You can get three tests in one with this quiz for love. Answer forty questions, calculate your compatibility with your sweetie using numerology and astrological compatibility. Plus, learn the meaning of your names. This all should provide an hour or two of fun between two folks who are (they believe) in love!
  10. The Positive Way: This site’s goal is to help couples, “married or unmarried, single people looking for a relationship, and people wanting to improve their self-esteem and create more happiness in their lives.” You’ll find quizzes and tests on romance, communication, body langue and self development.

More Attractiveness Tests

The following tests and quizzes range from the “total package” deals where you can learn about intelligence, personality and physical attributes all at one site. Other quizzes focus more on money, happiness or the breadth of your cultural savvy. It’s up to you to decide what’s important to you, as this decision can help you learn about yourself as much as any quiz.

  1. Cultural Sensitivity Quiz: Are you a culturally competent adult? Find out with this short quiz. After all, you do want to broaden your horizons…that’s very attractive.
  2. Feng Shui Quiz: Don’t let this page’s ‘pinkness’ factor turn you off if you’re a male. This is a simple quiz that can help you learn whether Feng Shui can help make your abode – and you in the process – more attractive.
  3. Happiness Quiz: If you’re not happy, you won’t attract happy people (if that’s what you want). How do you know if you’re truly happy? Try this quiz to learn more about your happiness potential. Although the test is simplistic, you can learn more about what might make you happy at this site.
  4. Law of Attraction Quiz: This is just one of many online ‘law of attraction’ quizzes that will help you learn whether you’re attuned with the universe or not.
  5. NetDoctor: Test yourself on addictions, body image and self-esteem, depression, eating disorders and more. Try the tests at NetDoctor to find your answers.
  6. Postscript Relationship Quiz: Did you jump from one relationship into another? Emotional baggage isn’t attractive, but neither is a relationship based upon illusions. Take this test to find out where you stand.
  7. Savvy Spending Quiz: While some folks like big spenders, some thrift might make you more attractive. So, what kind of spender are you? Here is a spending quiz designed by MSN Money. They want to get you to think about how you spend money and, perhaps, to bring you closer to the ideal.
  8. Spare Change Challenge: Unlike the Savvy Spending Quiz, this test from Quicken challenges the way you live as well as the way you consciously spend your money.
  9. Test Cafe: How’s your anxiety level? Is your anger out of control? Learn more about your intelligence, your personality, your emotions and more with this site’s quizzes and tests.
  10. Your Amazing Brain: These folks are focused on your brain, but they also provide ways for you to test your body, to take surveys on sexuality and to check if your senses are on track.

The following sites are up your alley, as the first group are totally free, and the other sites offer free trials, free basic memberships or free options to meet people through specific formats. Since you have a choice among fifty sites, we hope that you’ll find a venue that suits your needs. Time is all you need — along with a little charm, a great photo and a willingness to be patient in your quest to find your soulmate.

We don’t favor one site over another; therefore, the sites below are listed in alphabetical order under each category.

Totally Free

We thoroughly combed through these sites to find a catch — and none was found. The sites listed below offer totally free formats for individuals who want to meet other people. Some sites offer more formats for conversation, and some are easier to use than others. It’s up to you to find a site that suits your personality and desires.

  1. SearchingForSingles: This site offers free online dating, with features such as Instant Messenger, chat rooms, forums, email, horoscope, “matchfinder” and privacy control. Register free and start your relationship search immediately.
  2. OneNightFriend: OneNightFriend is a 100% free online dating site. Chat, email, talk in their forums and get date ideas. It’s all safe, fun, and free.
  3. Iwantu: Iwantu is a totally free online dating, personals and friendship community for adults. This site combines the ideas of open chatting and self expression for like minded friends and singles looking for dates, and you never need to pull out your credit card.
  4. Askme4Date: This UK dating site provides a safe, highly confidential environment where disabled people from all walks of life can meet to find friendship and love (but, this site is not limited to disabled individuals). Currently all memberships are free, meaning you register to create a profile and contact other users.
  5. Iamnaughty: As the site states, “If someone asks for your money, it’s not the Official Iamnaughty website!” Advertisers cover their expenses, which means users have unrestricted free access to their singles’ ads with no credit card required.
  6. DreamSingles: Connecting Singles is a totally free-to-use online dating service for singles. All features, including searches, forums, blogs, polls, chats, videos and more on Connecting Singles are without charges, fees, credits, coupons or surprises.
  7. Dating ‘n More: Dating ‘n More offers free dating and dating services with free personal ads as well as dating forum for singles who wish to make friends and meet other singles online for serious relationships, casual relationship, flirting, friendships, e-mail, romance, love and even marriage.
  8. DatingHall: Browse through photos and profiles through a qualifying search feature without registering. But, if you want to contact someone, you need to register first. You also can post a customized profile with a photo and maintain unlimited free contact with all DatingHall members once your register.
  9. Datopia: Jump into the dating pool through Datopia, where you can create a free profile with photo and begin communicating with other singles immediately. You can contact other members anonymously through email or through online text/audio/video chat free of charge.
  10. ezdate123: Never pay for romance, friendships or relationships ever again. You’ll find 100% free dating at ezdate123, where you can create a profile, search for people and join in chat rooms without charge.
  11. I Flirt You: This site is totally free, and you can meet people for all types of relationships through an onsite mail system, chat rooms and instant messenger. Connections are international, or you can limit yourself to find that special girl or guy next door.
  12. IamFreeTonight: This is a 100% free online dating service that enables you to meet tons of single face-to-face. Their exclusive “Date Now!” and “Double Dating” features can land you a date by this evening!
  13. JackfoundJill: Join this brand-new dating site to find the partner of your dreams. The focus here is on American users only, so international dating is not available. But, you can enjoy meeting folks in your area or across the nation through profiles, photos and more as you get in on the bottom floor for free.
  14. JumpDates: JumpDates offers 100% free online dating services, including personals, matchmaking, full editing of your profile after registration, advanced messaging system, and a search and save feature.
  15. Lets101: Lets101 not only is free, but they continuously work to help you find the right date through their powerful personality matching programs, expert advice, email introductions and phone and chat facilitations.
  16. Love.org: Feel free to contact others, send and receive messages, post a profile, search through hundreds of profiles and rate members — all for free. You must register before you can begin to use their services, so no peeking allowed.
  17. Mingle2: A couple of guys from San Francisco maintain this totally free dating site. Instead of using matchmaking software, you decide who your ideal match should be through forums, chats, easy-to-use search features and countless other ways to meet others.
  18. Mingles: Enjoy a free site with built-in anti-spamming controls, unlimited photos, easy group creation and blogging tools and video chat and instant messaging. You even can add a video message to your profile!
  19. My Happy Date: Enjoy free Internet dating at My Happy Date, a site that began as 100% free and continues this service today. You can use Instant Messenger for contact, upload a profile and photo, and utilize My Happy Date’s special “My Matches” profile matching service.
  20. OkCupid: OkCupid is a truly free online dating site, and it’s powered by a matching system you invent. Over three million photos have been uploaded, and you can join in on a free forum and take several dating and relationship tests.
  21. Plentyoffish.com: With over 10 million members and free membership and use, it’s easy to see why Plentyoffish is the premier online dating website for finding love. Some features include free personality tests, a free instant messenger service and private chat, weekly matches sent to your email, thousands of local personal ads, advanced search options, singles events and parties organized by Plenty of fish members in your area.
  22. Senior Passions: If you’re a senior looking for love, companionship or new friends, this site offers free chat, message boards and email. This is a 100% free community designed for senior users to enjoy life at its fullest.
  23. SimpleDating: No matter if you want to date or simply looking for a way to expand a circle of friends in your area, SimpleDating has a venue for you. When you click on a profile, you can learn about that person. If you want to contact them, however, you need to visit the original site where the profile is hosted. These sites may or may not be free.
  24. SocialGrid: SocialGrid is a free online dating service and decentralized social networking community that helps people meet using tags. Features include free contact, detailed searches, no profile required, free mail forwarding, member blocking and a strict spam policy.
  25. Webdate.com: Absolutely no credit card is required for users to begin to meet other people for relationship possibilities. Webdate is the fastest growing online personals, because you can use real time video chat to check another person in your area before you meet.

Free Basic Memberships

If you believe that you pay for quality, then this list is the next step in the free online dating market. You can join these sites for free, but you must pay to gain access to some features. Each site is different, and it doesn’t hurt to try them out to see if you want to pay for that extra commitment.

  1. AbleDating 2.4: This site caters to adults who are seeking a serious and long-lasting relationship. Free memberships include the ability to create a profile, upload a photo, search the member database and show interest in other members. If you like what you see, upgrade your membership at any time so you can chat and send emails.
  2. AmericanSingles: You can meet millions of members from all walks of life, backgrounds, professions and ages at this dating site. Join and create a free profile, post up to four photos, and browse through possible matches. Upgrade at any time to access email, instant messaging and real-time chat.
  3. Date.com: Create your free profile, browse the site, show interest in other members all for free. When you decide that you’re ready for more personal contact, you can upgrade to a Gold Membership to communicate with millions of members via IM, email or chat.
  4. DreamMates: Sign up at this dating service, and you can upload a profile and photo, express interest in another person and reply to messages. Upgrade at any time to Premium Membership, which entitles you to special benefits such as customizable content messages, Instant Messenger usage and other benefits.
  5. JRetroMatch: JRetroMatch is online Jewish dating service where expert Jewish matchmakers assist Jewish singles with finding love and meaningful relationships. You can try this site through a free basic membership, where you input a limited profile, sidestep the personal matchmaker, and limit your participation to a maximum of one match per week. You can upgrade your membership at any time.
  6. LavaLife: Free registration allows users to create a profile, sign up to one of three communities, browse personals and hand out “smiles” as contacts. But, an upgrade allows users to attain access to even more features. Give the free round a shot to see if you’re comfortable with this dating service.
  7. Matchmaker: Join this dating service for free and you’ll be able to browse all profiles and photos on this site. You also can build a free profile and you can receive email from other members. This should give you enough of a taste of this site to learn whether or not you want to upgrade your membership.
  8. Perfectmatch: Become part of the Perfectmatch.com for free as a basic member. Once you register, you’ll find many useful features and tests, all designed to help you make those first steps in the dating process. Once you feel that this is the dating service for you, you can upgrade your membership.
  9. PlentyMoreFish: Registration is and “always will be 100% free” at this UK dating site. With a basic membership, you can create a profile and upload a photo and send as many people a “wink” as you want. When you upgrade, you can view and upload multiple photos, use their full advanced search, use instant chat and much more.
  10. SinglesSingles: You can try a new way of dating through compatibility merits and not on dating preferences alone. Curious? Join now and enjoy a free basic membership for life, with the ability to upgrade anytime.

Free Trial Sites

The following sites usually require payment for registration and use, but they’ve offered new members a chance to try the sites with a trial membership. Be careful, as those trial periods seem to end faster than they started, and your credit card will feel the punch. For your protection, be sure to read all the fine print before you register and provide the sites with your credit card. With that said, you may find the love of your life at one of these sites, so give it a go!

  1. Adam Meet Eve: Enjoy a hefty ten-day trial with this dating service that focuses on Christian relationships and ‘love connections.’ This site is for marriage-minded men and women, and features include chat, private introductions, personal ads and more.
  2. Christian Singles Dating: If you’re looking for a mate who shares similar values, you can try this Christian dating site free for two weeks. Plus, this site offers plans based on your ability to pay, rather than a flat-based fee when your free trial expires.
  3. ChristianCafe: Create your free trial profile and browse thousands of profiles of other Christian singles. ChristianCafe’s free trial includes posting a profile and communicating with other singles using email, winks or quick messaging.
  4. Easyflirt: When you sign up with Easyflirt, you’re given points that you can use toward Easyflirt’s services. You can use those points to meet and chat with people online, so this is a great opportunity to discover whether Easyflirt is the dating service for you.
  5. eHarmony: It’s free to register, and new registrants can take the questionnaire review your first 25 matches at no charge.
  6. FriendFinder: Join for free to begin browsing through over one million online profiles, photos and videos. Create your own profile as well. Your free membership does not expire so you can browse at your heart’s content until you decide you’re ready to communicate with your interests.
  7. JewishCafe: If you’re seeking someone who shares your background and values, JewishCafe provides a community where you can meet companions, friends, dates, or a soulmate in a safe environment. This site provides a full two-week no-obligation trial so you can discover whether this dating site is for you.
  8. Match.com: This is a free trial offer by Match.com to try their dating services for seven days without charge. You will have access to all of Match.com’s services, and if you don’t cancel within seven days, you’ll be charged for full services at the end of the trial period.
  9. Singlesnet: Join Singlesnet today for a limited-time free trial offer. You can contact members receive, read and reply to emails from members, create a personality profile and use their compatibility matching technology. No credit card required.
  10. Yahoo! Personals: Yahoo! provides a premier dating service with millions of members. While the service is not free, they provide a seven-day trial period on any dating plan. Use this free trial to try out their powerful matching tools and dating categories.

Free Services

The services below offer more or less than the full-service dating services listed above. Some sites offer more services through extra communication channels, and some sites offer a highly refined service or format that simplifies the “meet and greet” process for many individuals. Since they’re all free, there’s no sense in avoiding every free opportunity to find that dream date!

  1. Friendsation: Friendsation is a new social blogging network where people can meet on various levels. Friendsation members have the control to choose when and how they want to connect, whether it’s through live chat or Mobile device — for any kind of connection, whether it is friendship, dating or relationships — all for free.
  2. Passions Network: Join this online dating niche social network for free and enjoy over 110+ dating sites. Once you join, you can choose the sites that match your interests. Enjoy free photo personals and singles’ chats, message boards and email.
  3. SocialBang: SocialBang provides a virtual world where you can meet new friends and even play games and win prizes. You can gain access to a regular chat, dating chats and utilize a Facebook or MySpace chat application as well. All for free.
  4. SomeoneNew: Although this is a free dating site, SomeoneNew allows a special service that doesn’t lock you into their site. You can add your Skype, MSN Messenger, MSN Live Messenger, Yahoo Messenger, Google Talk, AIM and ICQ details and, if you wish, you can share these details with other users all for free.
  5. True: You can find all types of chats here, from singles to teen to Latino, Black, parents, Christian and over 40. Lots of members use video chat, so not only can you type back and forth, but you can actually see who you are talking with — all for free.